Hey there are you horrible monsters, New Guy here. Hope you had a Merry Christmas or Solstice or Vampire Day or whatever else you do. As I mentioned before, I'm out doing SECRET MISSION SHIT, which prevents me from doing Voice-y or Cell Leader-y stuff. But, lucky for you, Sasha's stepped up to do the Voice thing- and instead of making all of you change your bookmarks, she'll be posting through here. And because I'm a smartass, I'll add in my 'editorial commentary' through the BOLD TEXT like this. Rad, huh?
Hello to all of our Houston cell members (and those from other cells that read this), it is time for the new Voice to make my debut! I had snapped up the position, because as you all know, New Guy is on long-term assignment and I happen to have a journalism background. I'm known to you as Sasha, the local Autumn Riddleseeker Sphinx that wears unusual dress to meetings. I'll be your Voice for the foreseeable future, so let's get to it!
Now it might be that I've been binge watching anime and am really hyped up on caffeine, but this month's meeting was not as populated as I've seen in my time with Accord. Figures, I guess even vampires and other supernaturals take time to glut themselves for the holidays or have other affairs elsewhere. It's no biggie. No sooner did I get there, having gotten off work early and had a treat of sushi (yes, this sphinx loves her fish), then was pizza ordered and a new guy, Ben (Hayes, Hughes? Sorry I don't remember the last name well. Let's hope he doesn't end up skewered by a servant into a light-up phone booth in the Upper Kirby district) arrived at the behest of New Guy since he apparently got too much of the CuT's attention with his hard-hitting investigation, or something along those lines. He's kinda attractive for a mortal, but I've got a little too much on the plate to go pursuing romantic relationships at this point. Namely, Rylin and his trod-trotting ideas. *sighs* We also had a woman visiting from New York (I didn't catch her name), and a Bald eagle changer from Miami (I think his name was Eric) with a major "'murca" complex, and New Guy and a few others Skyped in on Cora's tablet. Apparently Eric screwed a swan changer without protection, turned blue and swelled up and then burst and became what he is currently. You can thank Cora for the details.
The lady from New York was Marianne (who kind of scares me, but in a good way?) and the bird-guy was Ben, from Miami, who's shown up from before. Also, Ben has now officially surpassed Cora for the "worst love life ever" award.
We had two away teams go out this time around, which is apparently the norm even though we were holding a Christmas party. Ah well, gotta fight the good fight regardless of eggnog and Cora's Chocolate Fizz (which is apparently pretty good, but I don't drink alcohol).
I was on the first away team, as my first assumption was that we had some True Fae or Loyalist activity going on. That turned out to not be the case, as "Santa" killed the four missing children that had been Amber Alerted within the past few weeks. We had an abomination and an independent cult on our hands, and with Eric, Wolf, Apophis (I hate his name), someone else (sorry, my memory escapes me at the moment), and myself, we were able to turn the "Santa" into dirty slush in a bus barn in Pearland. It also made me think that I should do some more practice at the range again with my Beretta, because my aim has been fucking horrible these past couple of months. I guess I better get some practice with my khopesh while I'm at it.
The second away team didn't seem to fare as well as we did. They had a tear and a living math equation abomination attacking them! I do not envy those guys, I've never cared for math much, even when it's of the inert variety. Seriously, algebra stares into your soul with those variables. *shudder* I believe Ben, Artemis, and a few others were on that team. If I forgot your name, I'm sorry. I'm kinda bad at names since being back in the mortal world again.
After that happened, Apophis had an announcement to make. He admonished us for being mortals/human beings/not perfect (aka like him), and said he was going to take the Heroes' Walk. He also gave Wolf a emotional lobotomy before leaving and got punched for being the ass that he is/was. Now this is my opinion, but even though he thought himself above everyone else and emotions entirely, he was quite selfish for pulling such a stunt. I can kinda get the not seeing anything but the threat in front of you thing, but he didn't have to be such a cockmunch about it. After that, I got to talk with Ben and Firewall (on Skype for her) for a bit and fill newly dubbed "Mini New Guy" in a bit on what's been happening.
But yeah, seeing Apophis get punched like that was an oddly satisfying way to end the night. I do hope we make sure Ben is trained in handguns by next meeting, as I heard he shot the ceiling of the firing range, or else there's gonna be a lot of trouble if he gets out on an away team again. Also, New Guy, if you edit my posts to include your brand of humor, could you at least put yours in a different color or something? I'm not as slapstick as you, and prefer to write my humor on the dry and sarcastic side.
Anyways, see ya'll next month.
Sasha McKeller
So yeah. Post script: Apophis apparently had infiltrated the City Council and none of us noticed (what, with his alias/puppet/whatever not showing up on our general truthy investigations), which apparently he got pissed off enough about to go take a Hero's Walk? Fucking creepy, but that's what we should expect from him. So that'll be something we have to deal with AFTER we beat the Truth, because, well, we can beat it. We've got to. I'm going to be doing my part (from behind the scenes, at least), but with a new year, I really hope you guys can get your shit together.
With Apophis gone, I kiiiiind of nominated Ash to be the Interim Cell Leader. (Sorry! So, so sorry). Ash has been around even longer than I have, and she's damn good at what she does. Listen to her, and keep up the good fight. I'll be in touch.
-New Guy
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